Friday, July 5, 2013

Partied without him

Posted By on Fri, Jul 5, 2013 at 11:04 AM

As I was leaving the gym last week, I picked up a copy of the CL Gay Pride issue. Sitting in my car, sweating profusely as the blissful air-conditioning cooled me down, I opened up to an article called “Party Without Him” that boasted, against a rainbow background, about one gay man who has, it would appear, utter contempt for gay pride.

Ramon Reyes, a local software trainer for a tech services company, has an issue with gay Pride celebrations having niche groups of overtly sexual people. Muscled men in speedos? Appalling. Fetish clothing? Reprehensible.

This person wants to show the world that gays are not “inhuman, weird or sinner[s.]” However, according to him, this mighty task will surely never be accomplished until sexuality is removed completely from gay pride and replaced exclusively with professional homosexuals in loving relationships; then, and only then, will gay rights really advance in this lovely land we call America.

Now, I have been going to St. Pete Pride since its inception. I was in my early 20s and I remember the immense feeling of belonging I experienced during those first formative promenades. Naturally, my feeling of belonging became even stronger as I watched our tiny little parade explode into the massive gala it is today. In fact, I would go as far as to say I felt proud.

So one could say, on a fundamental level, I disagree wholeheartedly with what this pride-hating person says. Still, I wish I could sit down with him and ask him a few questions:

• Has he ever read any queer theory and is he aware that, especially for older generations of LGBT, that sexuality and politics can and do go hand in hand?

• Why are muscled men in speedos so bad? Does he consider them to be any different than a girl in a bikini? And for that matter, could his overt disgust over male sexuality be what some might call internalized homophobia? Or, even worse, jealousy?

• If being gay really means, by his definition, “falling in love,” does that cancel out all the other gay sex that happens for the unfortunates who simply just want to have a little fun?

• Does he realize that cutting out a certain group simply because of how they act or how they dress is eerily similar to the very evils the gay rights movement has been fighting all the years?

• Why did he feel the need to say, “I could fuck a chick and get off, but that doesn’t make me straight” to prove a point? Has he ever heard of Dr. Kinsey?

• What’s your problem, man?

I probably will never get to hear the answers to my question from this person. Not that I truly mind, though. We obviously lead very different lives and, from this person’s POV, my moral compass is totally eschewed.

I believe that Gay Pride is about showing off your LGBTQ side in any way that doesn’t hurt others and break any laws. I also believe this person wouldn’t like my suggesting that maybe all this hatred is because deep down he simply doesn’t want to be gay…err…I mean “inhuman, weird or [a] sinner.” He wouldn’t like that I would tell him that I feel sorry for him, and that I would like to invite him out for a drink at Georgie’s, where I would be sure to remind him no human is inhuman, everyone is weird and sin is merely fun in disguise.

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