Apparently my apprehension has been unfounded. According to the San Francisco Chronicle, The Transportation Safety Administration (TSA) is not only cool with dildos and vibrators, they also invite you to travel first class with your whips, chains, leashes, and restraints.
Traveling with most small vibrators carries no more restrictions than flying with an electric toothbrush. TSA officers are trained to identify and handle sex toys. However, there are a few tips you should know when flying with your pleasure product to avoid an embarrassing scene or the loss of your electric pleasure stick:
Be proud of your sex toy: Being ashamed of your dependence on your vibrator to get through a holiday weekend will only arouse suspicion, especially if you're nervous about flying with your magic wand. TSA officers are trained to identify and provide extra screening for nervous travelers. If you're asked about your electronic device, don't plead ignorance. This will only trigger additional screening and the possible confiscation of your toy. Be honest and straightforward. Saying, "Yes, that is my vibrator," is usually enough to end any line of questioning.
If you bring a foot-long dong as a carry-on, it better have its own ticket: You can bring a machete on an airplane so long as you pack it in your checked-luggage. If your vibrator is anatomically correct or large enough to be described as club-like, pack it in your checked bags. If you don't have checked bags, only bring a vibrator small enough to fit in your pocket. When in doubt, or you are dealing with an expensive vibrator, put it in your checked luggage or leave it at home.
Hand tools are okay for carry-on: Vibrators smaller than seven inches are classified as hand tools and may be stored in your carry-on bag.
Remove the batteries: There is nothing more suspicious than a piece of luggage that is shaking and emitting a muffled humming sound.
Lubes: Treat personal lubricants as you would any other gel or lotion. Transfer your lube to unlabeled plastic bottles no larger than three ounces. All of your lube should be able to fit into a 1-quart plastic bag. If not you may have a problem larger than being an inefficient packer.
Bondage equipment: Whips and handcuffs are fine for carry-on, but like masturbation, their use mid-flight is frowned upon. If questioned about your gear by security, own up to these items and start to explain in detail how you use them. You will be waved through.
Sex toys overseas: Just because flying with sex toys is your patriotic right in the U.S., in other countries, particularly in the Middle East, pleasure products can land you in jail. If you are caught with a sex toy in a foreign country, don't pretend that the toy is a cigar holder or a massager. For some reason the police in countries where sex products are illegal always know exactly what things like butt plugs are and exactly how to use them.
Read more at sfgate.com