|  

Monday, January 11, 2010

Arts & Entertainment

It Happened This Week-ish: Tiger's manly affairs, another semilebrity death, breaking news on Michael Cera, Mariah Carey's drunk speech and engagements galore (including Marilyn Manson)

Posted by Amanda Allwood on Mon, Jan 11, 2010 at 10:30 AM

click to enlarge acrosstheuniverseprem7.jpg

*Hey boys, now you too can claim you had an affair with Tiger Woods! I am just waiting for Lance Bass to get on this train of mistresses...or misters? I think it's misters.

*My favorite washed-up pop princess, though she is probably at queen age now, Mariah Carey, gave us the best acceptance speech we could possibly ask for this week. And by best, I mean drunkest. Thank you Mariah, seriously thank you.

*Marilyn Manson and Evan Rachel Wood are among the holiday engagements during this fabulous season where all single girls flip through People Magazine, mumbling about how if that chick can find a man and I can't, I am going to go effing kill myself. Not that I would know, I don't do that....nope, never. Also, their kids are gonna be real pale and stuff. Ba-zing, take that happy couple!

*Casey Johnson, heiress to the Johnson & Johnson fortune, died this week at the young age of 30. It appears that 2009 was just ramping us up for young and untimely deaths, as we started this year off with yet another young "celebrity" leaving the world too soon. Luckily, E! took it upon themselves to ask the question on everyone's minds...Casey Johnson: What Will Happen to Her Dogs?

*Get ready for the most shocking headline of the week. No, seriously, like this is insane. I read it and I was like..."Wait. (pause for effect) Seriously?! Wow. Just, wow." Check it out after the jump, if you dare...

...Michael Cera Attends a Movie Screening. US Weekly, you are like, the Isaac Newton of investigative journalism...turning my world up-side-down with these hard-hitting, life-changing stories.

click to enlarge jerseyAB.jpg
*I feel like we need to follow that up with something a little more comforting so here you go, Jersey Shore fans (aka, everyone who has eyes, ears and a sense of humor), the cast will ALL be back for season two. What would we do without those abs, those spray tans and the bumpit-less poofs?!?! Luckily, we don't need to find out just yet.

*Reese Witherspoon answered the question: How to Get My Body...I thought that answer was "be Jake Gyllenhall or Ryan Phillipe. I misunderstood, the real article is far less interesting.

*Welp, look at that, Katy Perry and Russell Brand are engaged too. And Jane Krakowski and some dude. Cool, no, that's awesome, seriously. I hope they are all really happy together while I am single and alone on these cold winter nights. Unrelated, does anyone know where I can find a shotgun?

*As if that Mariah Carey video wasn't enough to make my life worth living, I give you a little something I like to call "Andy Roddick and Koala Sex, a Musical."

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Comments (0)

Subscribe to this thread:
By Email
With RSS

Add a comment

Latest in Daily Loaf

Author Archives

Search Events

all events
concerts
restaurants
movie times

Recent Comments

Top Commenters

Most Popular
Most Shared
Most Commented

© 2012 SouthComm, Inc.