Welcome to On the Radar, where we preview up-and-coming arts events to mark your calendar for. Nothing says sex me up like roller skates wait. Thats weird. Oh well, any excuse to celebrate the holidays in smutty style works for me including next Thursday's Santas Sexy Helper Adult Skate. Come (I cant help myself) in full naughty-list seasonal garb and get free admission. Just watch where you stick those Christmas lights. Thurs., Dec. 17, 9 p.m., United Skates, 5121 N. Armenia Ave., Tampa, $7 without costume, myspace.com/unitedadultnight. Franki Weddington
Next Thursday night's installment in the Dali and Beyond surreal cinema series is Peter Capaldis Franz Kafkas Its A Wonderful Life -- perfect for the Christmas cynic in all of us.
The deranged short takes the spirit of Frank Capra's holiday classic for an award-winning black comedy that imagines the famous author suffering writers block on Christmas Eve, continually stumbling over how to complete the first sentence of Metamorphosis and being tormented by holiday revelers downstairs. Sounds like a typical Tuesday during the holidays, if you ask me. Thurs., Dec. 17, 6 p.m. $5 after 5 p.m. Salvador Dalí Museum, 1000 Third St. S., St. Petersburg, salvadordalimuseum.org. Franki Weddington
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