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Tuesday, August 11, 2009
Runners' rules: Learning Bayshore Boulevard etiquette
Posted by Caitlin Reagan on Tue, Aug 11, 2009 at 2:58 PM
My first experience on Bayshore Boulevard was nearly a year ago, on a gorgeous day in the fall — sunny and breezy. My brother Phil had suggested we spend the day walking along Bayshore. This was the day I was introduced to Bayshore Etiquette.
“First, you should know that there is absolutely no stopping on the sidewalk. If you need to stop, just move over to the grass but not in the grass lane,” he said as he pointed to the half-dead line of grass that stretched along the sidewalk.
“Oh, and always travel on the right side of the sidewalk, Caitlin,” he told me while waving his arms back and forth in front of him to show me an imaginary lane in front of us.
“Often, a group of women will travel in a group and block the whole sidewalk,” he said as we continued to walk down Bayshore. “It’s very annoying.”
After a mile or so, Phil and I stopped, turned around and walked back — on the right, that is. We had a short walk that day, but he left me with a very strict list of rules for my next visit to Bayshore Boulevard.
My next visit to Bayshore was last Saturday afternoon at about 5 p.m. I parked my car in the free parking lot, stretched, and moments later, I was jogging — on the right.
As I’m huffing and puffing along, Phil’s words of guidance boomed in my head:
“Don’t bring an entourage. At most, bring one friend,” echoed his voice. Check! I was jogging alone.
“Rollerblading is annoying. It takes up the whole sidewalk and those rollerbladers act like they’re entitled to every ounce of space.” Check! No rollerblades!
“When passing another person, don’t touch them. Leave at least 6 inches of space.” Check! No brushing of the shoulders!
Just when I was thinking that Tampa was lucky to have me, I witnessed the most unkosher event in Bayshore history, I think. A woman with bleached-blonde hair, breasts the size of large cantaloupes and severely swollen lips soaked in red lipstick not only stopped in the sidewalk but stretched — on the left! There she stood in her purple and black spandex get-up with one leg up along the wall. She casually reached to her right. Then lifted her other leg and casually reached to her left.
As I jogged past, I glared at her — from at least 6 inches away. Doesn’t she know about Bayshore Etiquette?
Later that week, when I told Phil about what I’d witnessed, he laughed and said, “Uh, Caitlin. Even if she knew about Bayshore Etiquette, she was purposely breaking the rules. She was on Bayshore for different reasons.”
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