When I'm not stalking former Idol contestants, Im counting down the days, OK the hours, til the next season of Project Runway begins Aug. 20. With just a couple weeks to go before the long-overdue season premiere, my Tim Gunn-themed Advent Calendar is getting a lot of use.
Even though Im pretty upset about that whole "it's on Lifetime now" stab in the heart, I decided I needed to find some dirt or at least info on the new contestants. Well, I was delighted to see that Lifetime has already posted contestant profiles!
So ladies (and a few gentlemen who dare to visit the Lifetime website to watch the videos and play along), let's judge these designer hopefuls before we know anything concrete about them, shall we?
Designer: Christopher Straub
Thoughts: His clothes in the video look totally cheap, like Rave cheap.
Predictions: He will last a few weeks before they realize he has no sense of class.
Designer: Johnny Sakalis
Thoughts: I got bored after he said "this is where the magic happens," thought I was watching an episode of Cribs from '03.
Predictions: Heidi won't appreciate his his slut-wear.
Designer: Louise Black
Thoughts: Gothic girl with the last name Black. Uh-huh, that's a real name, sure.
Predictions: If her portfolio is any indication, she is all talk, no results.
Designer: Irina Shabayeva
Thoughts: She may be from NY but her clothes look very Miami not in a good way.
Predictions: First to be "out."
Designer: Ari Fish
Thoughts: Her lack of experience is pretty clear, but that may work for her. What won't work? Her obsession with hooded clothing.
Predictions: She will be the one who finishes nothing but sticks around because of her "vision."
Designer: Nicolas Putvinski
Thoughts: His picture is uber-creepster and then wait for it HELLO SEQUINS!
Predictions: I see a good lingerie designer, and we all know how that goes.
Designer: Mitchell Hall
Thoughts: What's up, Mr. Tight Pants?
Predictions: A bare portfolio either means he has a lot of ideas or he has absolutely nothing to offer. Jury is out on this guy.
Designer: Shirin Askari
Thoughts: Sweet girl with less than impressive collection of dresses you could find in any Sears.
Predictions: If there is a Mardi Gras bead challenge, she's got it.
Designer: Gordana Gehlhausen
Thoughts: I'm sorry, what did you say?
Predictions: Did you see that portfolio? Im still trying to figure out how she got on the show is there some sort of foreign quota they had to fill?
Designer: Carol Hannah Whitfield
Thoughts: Awwww, isn't she adorable. Wait, does she live out of her car? Like Jewel?
Predictions: She will cry, a lot.
Designer: Ra'mon-Lawrence Coleman
Thoughts: Utterly forgettable.
Predictions: He will squeak by in the middle until they realize he is still on the show, then kick him off for being boring.
Designer: Logan Neitzel
Thoughts: What's worse than loving "leatha"? Loving fake shiny black leather-like fabric.
Predictions: They will keep him around based on his rock-star quality for a week or two, until he finally goes overboard with superfluous zippers.
Designer: Malvin Vien
Thoughts: He probably rides a fixed gear bike and has been featured on LATFH.com. He will be my favorite.
Predictions: He will make Carol cry. Those hipsters are little bitches.
Designer: Qristyl Frazier
Thoughts: Im already annoyed with her. Bell sleeves and halter tops? Really?
Predictions: Auf Viedersehn Qristyl. Irina, you have an extra week until you're out.
Designer: Epperson
Thoughts: He's playing the Cute Kids Card and I am falling for it.
Predictions: I give him about halfway through the season, maybe longer, before things totally crash and burn.
Designer: Althea Harper
Thoughts: Is this Girls Next Door or Project Runway? (I will save the commenters the trouble: No, I am not jealous of the Jessica Simpson look-alike, but thanks for assuming so.)
Predictions: She is going to get tripped up on the "Make a Garment out of Something Ridiculous Challenge," no way she has the brain capacity for that. She will also cry.
Am I going to predict the winner? Nope, not yet. No one really sticks out as a phenomenal designer or fantastic personality, but I am sure that will change as things heat up in the workroom.
Who else cant wait? Any predictions or premature judgments? Leave it in the comments!
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