Monday, October 27, 2008

The Cranky Copy Editor — Monday, October 27

Posted by Anthony Salveggi on Mon, Oct 27, 2008 at 1:55 PM

They say good things come in threes. Apparently, so do bad things. To wit:

Rocco DiSpirito, the self-absorbed tool who used his elderly mom like a pack mule to make meatballs on the NBC/Bravo reality series The Restaurant, crawls out from under his rock to star in Rocco Gets Real on A&E.  "There's nothing I love more than helping people find their place at the table," he says. Wrong. There's nothing Rocco loves more than Rocco.

Jon Gruden. Your team’s down by four points with less than a minute to play, and the Cowboys were favored by 2.5. Kick the field goal. Forget going for the win — I needed your team to kick the field goal. Next time, just cover the spread and take your loss like a man, m’kay?

Patti LaBelle. For being yet another diva who turned the National Anthem into a interminable ordeal of hubris and inappropriate vocal acrobatics. If you're gonna croon a slow, soulful version of "The Star Spangled Banner," you've got to be good. Like Marvin Gaye before the 1983 NBA All-Star game good. Not only was Patti not good, she even sang the wrong words: "perilous LIGHT"?! And to add insult to aural injury, she also added words, repeating “free” three excruciating times. Sitting through the National Anthem is usually an anxiety-inducing experience, fearing for the person charged with singing a difficult song that dares you to hit “the rocket’s red glare” without cracking off key. This just made me cringe.

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Cover the spread? One does not play to cover the spread, one plays to win.

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Posted by Emily on October 27, 2008 at 10:46 PM

Thank you, Confucius

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Posted by Anthony Salveggi on October 28, 2008 at 1:05 AM

Wow. What a horrible rendition of the National Anthem! That was worse than Roseanne Barr's "peformance" from several years ago.

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Posted by Melanie on October 28, 2008 at 8:56 AM

I missed "perilous light," but definitely heard her sing "skylight's last gleaming." It was a sad moment in national anthem history.

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Posted by Franki on October 28, 2008 at 9:22 PM

Good call, Franki. I can't believe I missed that. Un-real.

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Posted by asalveggi on October 28, 2008 at 9:58 PM
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