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Wednesday, August 20, 2008
“I shave, you shave. We all shave for hygiene”
Posted by Single White Female on Wed, Aug 20, 2008 at 6:05 AM
Here’s the deal. I know a LOT of men who would agree that most women should be virtually hairless, and I for one, would have to agree with them.
I also know a LOT of women who feel that men should start sharing in this joyous activity.
Imagine you are with a woman for the first time. Things are going splendidly. Maybe you get a little bold and decide to pull a naked ass-grab… only to find something that resembles the Furbie you owned back in '92.
Hair is not something ANY woman wants to find on a man’s cute tushy. Now don’t go thinking you’re safe just because you have a fuzz-free peach… those of you experiencing any slight indication that you haven’t fully evolved by having a hairy back… you’re guilty too.
We women go to great lengths to make sure we resemble a nicely groomed 3rd grade girl. For some reason you have managed to convince us over the years that any kind of hair growth is a bad thing. Which is fine, I am not one for promoting female armpit/leg or *cough* va-jay-jay *cough* hair. In fact, I spend a lot of time removing it.
Do you have any idea how bad it hurts when you accidentally cut your vagina? Now this is a personal choice. Yes, I choose to be hasty in my shaving rituals as I think any female who takes longer than 15 minutes to shower is just a selfish whore, and yes, this tends to result in an unpleasant cut or two.
Men, all I am asking for here is a LITTLE bit of concern for your own unorthodox body growth. We don’t ask you to wax your eyebrows (like I had to last night. It hurts very much bad). We wouldn’t dare ask you to cover up those sand bags under your eyes with a little concealer, and God forbid we ask you to dress better than someone who just crawled out of a Peruvian dumpster.
No, no, no.
All we ask is that you remove any indication that you are not quite pulling in 1st on the evolutionary chain. PLEASE, SHAVE/WAX YOUR NASTY BACK AND ASS.
If not, I vow we start a new movement of ’70s-style women.
You’re going to need machetes, boys. Thanks and have a lovely, lovely fuzz-free day!
Comments (2)
Showing 1-2 of 2
Um, wouldn't the last 7 years have been a perfect time for a bush revival? I really think you're pulling into the station a little late there. And please, ladies, feel free to go over 15 minutes in the shower. I gotta tell you, if I'm choosing between a woman with an ample pubic patch and one who has a bleeding, sliced and scarred vagina, I'd much rather be picking short and curlies from my teeth than washing the scabs from my mustache. Just a thought.
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