The stranger pulled the blanket tighter around him. I poured him a whisky; he nodded his thanks, and asked who was in charge.
"Officially? No one," I told him. "In here? You stutter the flow of this place and I'll have to make an example of you."
He laughed. "Put my head on a pike outside?"
I didn't laugh. "I'll put your head on the next boat, along with the rest of you."
"The next boat?" The stranger sipped his drink, considering. "Why is that bad?"
"Only two kinds of people get on the boat. The ones that know they're being punished, and the ones that don't."
The board of Citizens
, the "insurance company of last resort" for the millions of Floridians who were approved for mortgages they shouldn't have gotten in a million years (and for tens of thousands of wealthy folks who would do literally anything, including murdering orphans, to save four dollars), voted unanimously to raise its rates
for South Florida homeowners. Sure, it's infuriating any time an insurance company goes "shit, we had to pay out so much that our profits suffered for once, so we're gonna pass expense that along to you," but folks who don't have waterfront property stand to actually see a decrease in their rates as the cost goes up for those that do, so ... I'm confused. Was I about to give props to an insurance company? Life is a Rubik's Cube, and the one side we complete most often just happens to be the color of "ughwhatthefuckletsgobacktobed."