The Ta-Ta Top is a bikini top made in various skin tones with realistic looking nipples printed on each cup. The design was created by two feminists, Robyn Graves and Michelle Lytle, to help normalize the sight of the female anatomy without forcing the wearer to actually go topless. The bikini is in support of the #FreeTheNipple campaign, which argues that the sight of the female nipple is no more salacious than male nipples, and should not be censored in public or online. Also, $5 from every $28 purchase is donated to a breast cancer charity. The tops are available through thetatatop.com
A hospital in Nanjing, China created an automatic sperm extractor to ease the process of sperm donation. The machine has a rubber massage tube that can adjust to the donor's height. The gadget also allows users to set the temperature, frequency, and amplitude of the artificial vagina. If the man-milking machine alone doesn't provide enough stimulation, a small TV screen is mounted atop the device to play erotic content.
New York's Museum of Sex is set to open an exhibit called "Funland: Pleasures & Perils of the Erotic Fairground," which mixes the interactivity of a children's museum with adult fun. The instillation features a boob moon bounce where visitors are invited to "jump for joy." The exhibit also has a rock wall called "Grope Mountain" made entirely of orifices and appendages. There is also a "Tunnel of Love," which is a mirrored maze that leads to the "G" spot.
Rick Perry put a dick-shaped foot in his mouth recently when comparing homosexuals to alcoholics. Whatever he meant by the cock-brained comparison, Funny or Die was quick to exploit the homophobic politician's policies for comedic gold.
Men who use naked photos as a pick-up line may want to rethink their strategy after a Marco Island resident was arrested for drunkenly sexting an officer at 5 AM.
Paul Kirleis, 30, called 911 to report a suspicious vehicle in his neighborhood early Sunday morning. Officer Ryan Montomery responded to Kirleis using his police-issued cellphone. After the suspicious car problem was resolved, Montomery received two texts allegedly from Kirleis's phone asking, "Who's this??" and declaring, "I am boo." The officer then allegedly received three picture messages from Kirleis's phone. One reportedly showed a man in a black thong. Another featured a man bending over forward to expose his ass and testicles. The third revealed what appeared to be the same man showing his ass while grinning back at the camera. These messages were followed by the text, "Sooo."
When police questioned Kirleis, he allegedly claimed he had been “very intoxicated” and “did not remember much from the night.” Kirleis refused the officers' requests to search his phone. Kirleis was arrested on stalking and obscenity charges, both misdemeanors. He remains in a Collier County jail on $10,000 bond.
Women are tired of having their phones bombarded with tasteless dick pics that have bad lighting, the same tired poses, and uninspired backgrounds. Rockthatcock.org created an imaginary smartphone app that allows you to add some romance to your vulgar penis pics. The photoshopping options are only limited by your imagination. You can send your dick to the moon, dress him up as a religious figure, give him some sexy tattoos, position him as the crown piece on a majestic unicorn. If only this app were real, guys would finally have a great excuse to send dick pics, and women might actually want to receive them.
What happens when you mix weed, a parody porn, jessica drake's ass, and a ravenous craving for popsicles.
By Shawn Alff
on Thu, Jun 5, 2014 at 4:03 PM
I just texted my friend Sydney a shirtless selfie because I’m stoned and I haven’t had sex in a week and I have a lingering case of blue balls from the previous night when a woman had me pull her hair for thirty minutes while thwarting my attempts to burrow under her shirt. Paranoia sets in. Did I just send that shirtless selfie to the wrong person? That happened last night when the hair-pulling-fetishist wanted to get stoned and I texted the wrong number asking where I could score some “greenery,” as I've never arranged a drug deal and I have no idea what the cool word for pot is. Turns out drug dealers aren’t incredibly reliable and my hookup happened a day late, leaving me to get stoned alone in a bathtub, attempting to entice Sydney to come over with promises of greenery, popsicles, and my shirtless self. This is all to say that my mind and body are in prime physical shape for reviewing porn, as I’m fascinated and aroused by pretty much everything, including the toaster.
Enough fluff. Let’s get these pants off and pop in Axel Braun's, Snow White XXX.
The all-girl EDM band, ADAM, had a simple idea for the music video to their latest single, "Go to Go." The camera focuses on a stagnant shot of these women singing while they are inconspicuously mounted on an intense vibrator. The women slowly transform from composed musicians to hot and bothered women who have a difficult time concentrating on the lyrics. It's impossible to watch this video and not smile with these women who quickly begin to break down and giggle as the song, and their orgasms, build toward climax. Watch the full video below.
"Ms. Shout wanted to have her way with my oversized imagination"
By Shawn Alff
on Wed, Apr 30, 2014 at 2:53 PM
I had to end the affair with my first grade teacher. Ms. Shout had taught me much, both in the ways of love and the alphabet, but we had grown apart — that, and another older woman had entered the picture.
My mother had set me up with Ms. Shout.
"Shawn said his teacher was an old, bald witch,” my mother told Ms. Shout the first time they met, then grinned at me like the petty cockblocker she was.